Main Ingredients:

See below ingredients and instructions of the recipe

Cooking Preparation of the Recipe:

Frying chicken, cut up Flour
Egg Milk

Wash and unless you are 19 and a beanpole with a family history of
living to 108, skin chicken pieces. PLACE WASHED CHICKEN PIECES on
CLEAN FRESH paper towel. Beat egg and milk together in bowl. Sift
flour with the following spices to taste: salt or Lowry's seasoned
salt, black pepper, Old Bay, curry powder (not much!), poultry
seasoning, red pepper (not much!) mustard powder (not much!) other
suitable spices to your taste. MSG may be purchased in ominous
looking bag from Chinese restaurant supply if you really want to
emulate the Colonel and really be a slacker, but Lowry's Seasoned
salt has enough MSG to please most. Should you not prefer MSG, skip
the Lowry's and use table salt. Note: Some people react to MSG so you
can query your guests. The Colonel is loaded with MSG, that's what
makes it taste so much like the Colonel. Deal with MSG according to
your preferences. On with the show. In a preferably electric skillet
at 350 (perfect!), or failing that, a non-stick skillet on Med. Hi,
put on some Puritan oil. (Oil is less likely to splatter you and oil
does not smoke.) Other oils are OK but Puritan is rated healthiest.
About 1/4" deep. Allow to reach 350. NEVER place the washed and/or
cooked chicken back in contact with any surface OR utensil (tongs,
etc.) that has touched the pre-cooked chicken. There is a very
prevalent problem with chicken just lately, but cooking takes care of
it. Always, always, use a clean surface/utensil. Put flour mixture in
bowl or pie tins, or a bag, depending on if you want to roll or
shake. Roll or shake chicken pieces in flour mixture; then dip in
milk mixture. Then roll or shake them in the flour mixture (2nd
time.) Lower coated chicken pieces into 350 degree oil with tongs (DO
NOT EVER PIERCE THE PIECES) and cook EIGHT MINUTES ON EACH SIDE.
Covered skillet yields more tender crust. Uncovered yields crispier
crust. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES EVER poke the frying pieces with a
fork, knife, etc. Use the 8 minutes on each side rule at 350 degrees.
Poking releases juices that SPLATTER when they reach the hot oil.
This burns you. Also, don't let any water or moisture drop into the
oil. If this does not happen, it will not spatter you. If you need to
check done-ness, you can remove the very thickest piece from the
skillet onto a paper towel, and peek down to the bone and check for
any pink. There should not be any pink. While frying, if the outside
begins to darken too much before the inside is done, your heat is too
high. If this happens and you turn it down, you can continue frying
the pieces at an appropriate heat even with the outisde a little
dark, and it won't really hurt anything. The inside will still be
great!

Gravy: When chicken is done, pour out all the oil except for about
1/8" or a little less depending on how many people want gravy. Mix a
little bit (about 1/4 cup) of either regular flour or the kind in the
small round box that PROMISES not to lump, especially for sauces and
pastes and gravies, with COLD water to make a thin gruel in the
measuring cup. COLD helps it mix and not lump (this works with
cornstarch when making cobblers, pies, etc. too!) Mix the flour and
cold water with fork. Now, assemble extra flour, the whole carton of
milk, and water, and pepper and salt, in real real easy reach of the
skillet. Turn up the heat in the skillet with your smaller amount of
oil and drippin's, to about 425 or "Hi" for a minute. When it looks
alive again, stir in your flour water mixture REAL FAST and keep
stirring! It may start to look like it's going to lump but keep
stirring fast! The object is to brown that flour and oil goop as much
as you can before you add the milk. This is tricky and it never turns
out right. When you give up on browning the flour/water/oil goop any
more before it is cement, slowly begin to add milk and STIR FAST A
LOT. It will thicken and you add more milk as it cooks. Oh, by the
way, turn it back down to about 350 or Med. as it bubbles. When you
have about half the volume of gravy you are going to need, switch to
water instead of milk. You will not believe if you taste the yummy
chicken, that more salt and pepper will be needed for this gravy, but
if you taste it at this point you will see that the gravy is VERY
bland. You will need to add a LOT of salt, pepper, seasoned salt,
whatever is your taste. If your gravy does not go right and clumps up
during the browning stage, you are in fine company. Just go ahead and
add the milk, stir, and put the whole thing in the food processor;
afterwards, you can return the mixture to the skillet and teach it
who's boss. Just remember to season it enough. And serve on top of
some ho-made mashed potatoes!!!!!! P.S. M.S.G. fans, Lowry's seasoned
salt is EXCELLENT in mashed potatoes. Not gourmet. But very tasty and
nobody has to know! Oh, OK, you may want to check with your guests
before using anything with M.S.G. :-)

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